Strength

I've been smiling and enjoying my life a lot lately..
and I thought that I'm okay now..
I thought the pain has reduced and I thought I'm really strong enough to move on.
But you know what??
Maybe that's only a thought of mine..
Because when we met..
and talked..
It hurt so bad deep down here.
I showed my smile and laughter like I used to..
but at the same time it hurt so bad deep down here.
and the moment i felt that pain..
i realize..
who am i fooling all this time?
i miss you so damn bad.
really really miss you that it still hurts to see you.
what should i do?
why the pain ain't go away?
why?
I back off. i stayed away from you.
why does it still hurt?
why do I still miss you??
why there's still a piece of me still holding on to you?
why do you have to treat me like the way you treated me back then?
why do i have to feel happy and hurt at the same time the moment you talked to me, the moment you hold me, the moment you treat me like it was back then?
why why and why??
and at that moment, a question popped out in my mind..
"Lenn, what would you do if everything could be back like the way it was before?"
I don't know what the answer to this question.
really.
i don't want to be such a hypocrite.
deep down i still miss him, i still care for him, I still have feelings for him.
but at the same time, I'm afraid that he will hurt me again.
what should i do??
i really don't know.
one side of me telling me not to believe or give any chance no more..
but another side of me telling me, hey! go for it!! if it's meant to be, you just have to deal with it right?
i don't know.
i really don't know.
i'm afraid.
i'm confused.
can anybody show me the answer??
dear God, show me the way, please...
i'm so darn confused.
I don't know what should i do.
how should i treat him?
please. show me the answer. give me strength to deal with all of this chaos.
give me patience. give me clearance to all of this.

Amen.

December

hey hey ho!!! it's December! can you believe it??
how fast is itt??!!
anw it's been a while since i posted anything on my blog eh..??
been busy with my FYP..
thank God i've finished my proposal last night so i can have a short break from this FYP stuffs..
and hey!! HOLIDAY's cominggg...
8days to go!!

anw, i've been enjoying my life and appreciating it way more than before...
even i'm still missing someone..
hey, someone...
i miss everything about you... :'(
ah, skip it skip it!!! BE STRONG, LENN!! :)
ah, don't know what else should i share here..
maybe this is for the night..
goodnight fellas..

loveyou.xoxo. :)

Missing... ♥

Yes. I miss you.

Nicholas Starlie ♥

Nicholas...
I miss you so much.... :'(

So, lately I've been browsing pictures in my notebook..
Lots of moments and memories, I should tell..
And talking bout memories, one of many unforgettable memories I've had was the memories when I was teaching back then.. (again) ;)

Why Nicholas is so special and adorable to me..?
hmm.. let's see..
That was my first day teaching..
I was so nervous..
I had no experience in teaching at all back then..
And that time, they let me handle the position of assistant, since I'm still new. :)
When I entered the class..
It was so quiet...
The children are staring at me like "Who is this??? I don't know her.. I think she's scary"
fufufu.. :D
And I was sitting in front.. Beside my form-teacher..
And that's when Nicholas smiled at me..
He winked, and laughed at me..
And that moment.. I was really happyyyyyy....
I smiled back at him.. and suddenly he got shocked, because my form-teacher yelled at him,"Hey.. what's wrong with your eyes, Nico?? Caper (cari perhatian)??"
And that moment the whole class laughed at him because his reaction was so funny..
anw, they were 5.. :)

Ah, Nico...
Sometimes I met him..
with her sisters..
and from all students i've ever taught.. He's the one that is able to recognize me well.. way better than anyone.. :)

His smile broke all the nervous nerves inside of me..
Thank you, Nico..
You made my teaching life fun and wonderful.. :)

I miss you.. and I love you, Nico.. ♥ :)

What Hurts The Most

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let 'em out

I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while even though
Goin' on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm okay
But that's not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And havin' so much to say
And watchin' you walk away

And never knowin'
What could've been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do

It's hard to deal with the pain of losin' you everywhere I go
But I'm doin' it
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone
Still harder gettin' up, gettin' dressed, livin' with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade, give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And havin' so much to say
(Much to say)
And watchin' you walk away

And never knowin'
What could've been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do, oh
Oh yeah

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And havin' so much to say
(To say)
And watchin' you walk away

And never knowin'
What could've been
And not seein' that lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do

Not seein' that lovin' you
That's what I was trying to do, ooo

Note : Dear someone, do you still remember, it was February, this is the song that you loved so much. and you introduce this song to me. and since the moment i heard it, i've been loving this song so much. besides, this song really suits my condition now. I have so many things to tell you, but it's too late, you've walked away from me. this unspoken truth hurts so bad. i miss you. :'(

November ♥

wow.
it's November now.
in a blink of eye, it'll be December and soon it's 2011.
wow, that's so damn fast.

well, beginning of November isn't my favorite, I should tell.
many things have happened.
truth be told i am really disappointed and broken.
i should say that it's been a hard time.
really really hard time.
i wish i could rise again.
i wish i could find the spirit to move on and be okay.
i wish i could keep all those memories away and look forward.
i wish i could tell you sth but i can't. not anymore. it's too late.
and. even though it's hard. i truly wish all the best for you.
stay happy, because i love it when you smile.
and, i'm gonna miss you.
it's not like we're being separated by distance.
it's just. i'm gonna miss the past 'you'. moments with 'you'. the one who always make me smile.
i just need some time alone right now.
to calm my mind.
to throw away this feeling, so one day i can be back to the way i used to be.
the one who always smile for you and that time, it won't be a fake smile.
the tears i've shed, no matter how much, still haven't totally reduce the pain i feel here deep down inside.
just like what ppl always said, "let the time heals"
yea, i guess, i have to agree with that one.
it's hard for me. but i don't want to burden you with my pain.
i hope i can do it well.
so, i guess it's goodbye for now.
nobody knows what the future brings, anw.
so, i'm just hoping whatever comes up in the future, it'll be the best for me. for you. for us.

i never thought it'll ended up this way actually. i didn't have a clue at all.
but life's life.
nothing's predictable.
few seconds ago it was so beautiful and wonderful, and the next second you found yourself crying out loud.
i don't know what i'm going to do or how i'm gonna be okay.
but i have to.
i have ppl who loves me and whom i love supporting me.
thank you so much my family's always been there for me.
thank you so much my besties. i don't know how miserable i would be without you guys.

Dear God, give me strength.
I really need tons of strength right now.

hmm. enough with the mellow part.
well, November's still a long way to go (is it?)
so, i believe that better days are coming for me, and i'm ready to face it. AMEN!! :) *knock on sth wood 3 times* --> I'll always remember this knocking thingy you taught me.

P.S. : i'm so happy to know you. i'm so grateful for all those beautiful memories we've shared together. i'm gonna miss you.so much. :')

Broken Vow

Tell me her name
I want to know
The way she looks
And where you go
I need to see her face
I need to understand
Why you and I came to an end

Tell me again
I want to hear
Who broke my faith in all these years
Who lays with you at night
While I'm here all alone
Remembering when I was your own

I let you go
I let you fly
Why do I keep on asking why
I let you go
Now that I found
A way to keep somehow
More than a broken vow

Tell me the words I never said
Show me the tears you never shed
Give me the touch
That one you promised to be mine
Or has it vanished for all time

Chorus

I close my eyes
And dream of you and I
And then I realize
There's more to love than only bitterness and lies
I close my eyes

I'd give away my soul
To hold you once again
And never let this promise end

Chorus

P.S: this song is kinda sad, but the melody's great,, :D

Unexpected. Unintended. Unknown

hmm,,
i don't know how but it just came,,
it's unexpected,,
yes, feeling this way towards you, is unexpected, and unintended,,
i don't know how and when did it happen..
you just started to fill my mind day by day,, til today,,
truth be told,,
i must admit,, since you came,,
you've been filling my days with smile, laughter, tears, and so much more feeling all blended in one,,

is this love?
i must say i'm not really sure bout it,,
LOVE is kinda a strong word, you know,,
but all i know now is that,,
yes, i care for you,,
yes, whenever you're sad i really want to comfort you and help you get through it all,,
yes, you crosses my mind all the time,,
yes, i always miss you whenever you're not around,,
yes, i feel comfortable whenever i'm with you,,
yes, i like you,,
*BLUSH* can't believe i've just typed that out,, LOL

well,so,, is it love? or is it crush? if this feeling i'm feeling is truly a crush,, i bet it's a huge one,, XD
you want to know some funny facts about this?
well at first, when i know you,,
i never thought this feeling will come,,
and now when i think about it all over again,,
how could it be you?
how can i feel the way i feel for you??
how could this happen?
when is it?
well there are so much more questions and mysterious things spinning inside my head,,
well, that's just sth we can't answer, right?
cause it's unexpected,,
and what i can say is that i'm really happy, grateful, thankful, and lucky to know "YOU",,

at first,, you seemed so certain,, and i'm the one feeling uncertain,,
til you made me feel certain til now,, but i don't know bout your feeling,,
it's unknown,,
sometimes i wonder,,
"am i getting the wrong meaning of everything you've done for me? for how you've been treating me?"
how stressful is that?
but like what people always said,, "let it flow"
and i am,,,
because we never know what the future brings, right?

eventhough i must admit that you're not the same anymore,,
you're not the way you used to anymore,,
we didn't chat as often as we used to,,
we didn't say sth like "i miss you" and whatsoever anymore,,
we didn't call each other's nicknames anm,,
we didn't spend times as often as we used to anm,,
we didn't share stories and opinions as much as we used to anm,,
truth be told, i miss all those moments,, =(
i still remember how you came to my house with that yummy thing that just surprised me,, thankyouthankyouthankyou,, that event made my day! =D *hell yeah, i love surprises* X)
and i still remember how shocked i am that there's someone waiting inside your car at that moment,,
i still remember that picture you showed me,, even it's just sth that crossed your mind, but surely it makes me smile,,,
i still remember how you taught me lots of things,, which some of em have become my habits,,
and hey, i still remember that you promised me sth,, but you'll tell me what was it when the time's right, won't you? *haha*
and so so much more things,,
oh, really,, i miss them all,, =(
wonder if you do? @.@

but how am i supposed to clarify that?
who am i to say all those things,,?? *haeh*


ppl keep telling me to get you out of my head,,
but it's like quoted in a song,,
"cause i've tried and tried to walk away,, but i know this crush ain't going awayyyyy,,"
and all these times,, it's like i'm playing Colbie Caillat's Falling For You over and over again,,
hehe,,

and seems like recently you're not having good mood,,
hope things will be better for you soon,,
amen,, *knockonsthwoodthreetimes*

well, enough blabbering,,
at least i feel relieved a bit,,
ah, having show later on,, hope everything's gonna be fine,,
better off to bed,, goodnight,, and goodnight to you,, =)

Memories

hmm,,
it's been a while..
can't believe how time flies so fast..
it's October now..

atm, I'm sitting alone..
truth be told I don't even know what I'm gonna type. =.="
It's just,,
I kinda really need a place to talk, need someone to talk to, which I don't,,
so I ended typing these stuffs.. haahaa..

well, talking bout time,,
as I've always said,, time flies so fast,,
recently,, those memories keep coming back,,
all those beautiful, happy, thrilling, touching, sad, heartbreaking memories..
it made me smile and cry at the same time, tho..
I miss those moments,,
but I'd like to make sure one thing,,
no matter how much I want to go back,,
I never regret any of it..
I'm thankful it happened,,
even nobody wants it to end that way,,
but still,,
life goes on, right?
what's the point of looking back at stuffs you can't fix anymore,,?
you just have to stay strong, look ahead,, it doesn't mean you throw away all those memories, tho,,
it's just,, we can't live in the past forever,,
as usual, it's easier said than done,,
it was hard for me too at first,,
but somehow I managed to get through it.. thank God,, =)
and I know the road ahead might not be easy,,
I'm just hoping I'll be strong enough to face it,,

Amen.
*knock on something wood 3times*

P.S: that knockknock thingy,, I learned it from someone,, it's something we always did (hmm,, do?),,and somehow it's been my habit since then,, well, I wonder if you still remember,,? =)

Longer

Longer than there've been fishes
In the ocean
Higher than any bird ever flew
Longer than there've been stars
Up in the heavens
I've been in love with you.

Stronger than any mountain cathedral
Truer than any tree ever grew
Deeper than any forest primeval
I am in love with you.

I'll bring fires in the winters
You'll send showers in the springs
We'll fly through the falls and summers
With love on our wings.

Through the years as the fire
Starts to mellow
Burning lines in the book of our lives
Though the binding cracks and the
Pages start to yellow
I'll be in love with you.

Longer than there've been fishes
In the ocean
Higher than any bird ever flew
Longer than there've been stars
Up in the heavens
I've been in love with you
I am in love with you...

Notes : This is a simple romantic song with simple melodies,, i love how this song makes me feel so comfortable, calm, and i can feel the love shown in this song,, haa, i wish one day someone could sing this simple song to me,, ❤ *high-imagination* haha,, :)

A Visit

I am so glad.
My old friend and her baby and her mom visited me at the shop this afternoon.
I've been missing her for like, forever,,
and her baby is just so adorable, i even convinced her to give her baby to me,,,
i want a baby to myself!! *haha*
anyway we had a lot talking today,,
and still, it's not enough yet,,
wish to see her soon again,,
and her baby! >.<"

we did took some pictures, but too bad i can't share it now because she hasn't copied em to me,,
i'll share it here once i got it.. :D :D

Expectation

Hmm..
What crossed your mind when you heard the word 'expectation'?
Well, for sure it's something that mostly people have in their mind.
An expectation in anything,,
It might be life, friends, family, love, work, school, blahblahblah,,
Well,, I'm gonna share you guys sth bout expectation for I have no one to talk to bout this, and I'm sure writing em here will surely make me feel relieved even a bit,,

Someone once told me, 'don't be afraid to have high expectation in something'
I was convinced back then, that there's nothing wrong in having a positive mind in everything and try to expect more in anything, that way, it could improve myself.
But lately I've been thinking,,
Is it okay to think positive and expect more most of the time?
'Cause sometimes things in life ain't that simple,,
but still,, most part of me said that it's important to being able to think positive, it's sth that motivate us in doing things,,,
expecting more?
in my opinion, it's okay if we expect sth more but NEVER forget who you REALLY are in the first place, sth ppl make too much effort when in the end they lose the idea of who they really are, or,, were..?
you can expect more,, in a positive way,expect sth and make that sth as a motivation in your life in improving yourself, not in a greedy way,which will blind us and make us even more selfish than we already are now.
and be grateful for everything in your life, whether it's good ones, which bring you happiness, or the bad ones, which give you experience and a clear picture of what this life really is. :)
BE GRATEFUL!

but somehow, things aren't gonna happen like the way you want them to happen in this life.
you can't always get what you want.
when you expected sth but it doesn't happen,,,
when you believe and trust in sth but in the end you found out that you've been trusting the wrong ideas.
hmmm.. sometimes these things rage in my mind,,
which one is the best way? think positive or not? expect more or not?
in the end, i haven't found the answer,,
so far, the best answer i can tell you guys is, be wise, knows when to think positive or expecting sth, be wise and never lose yourself.

Do you know when you decided to open your heart to someone, no matter it's your bestfriends, families, or it is to someone you care about, you're starting to look like a fool in a good way cause you just love it? Love the way you feel when you're around them? Because I do love the way I feel when I'm around them, when I'm comfortable, be the way I am around them.
And through that all, something invisible came,, expectation..
You know they're good alr the way they are, but sometimes you just have this sth called expectation in them, you expect them to feel the way you do, you expect them to treat you the way you treat them, when we already know from the beginning that they've given those things to you, but human is a human, never get enough of what they alr had now, and tends to expect more, some may come in a good way, some may not.so, whatever comes, be grateful for it,,,
things happen for a reason,, :)
And for me? I'm done expecting too much in anything..
things ain't happen the way i always expect them to be.
maybe by seeing carefully and be wise in expecting thing will make me less disappointed in the end, 'cause the more I expect sth, the more disappointed I am in the end,,

I know I'm not a perfect person, and I can't give and be anything ppl want me to be.
But this is who I am. This is how I want to live my life.
And I don't want anybody telling me, judging, or command me about what to do and don't about my life, about who i am.
i'll just let everything goes with the flow now, whatever will be, will be.

Notes: Dear someone, this may sound awkward, maybe we've met so many times and have been spending a lot of times together, but don't know why,, still, I miss you,, there I said it. I've been such a coward to admit and say anything before, but,, hey, there I said it, even I didn't have the courage to say it directly to you.haha. :)

Karena Ku Sanggup

Biarlah ku sentuhmu
Berikanku rasa itu
Pelukmu yang dulu
Pernah buatku

Ku tak bisa paksamu
‘tuk tinggal disisiku
Walau kau yang selalu sakiti
Aku dengan perbuatanmu
Namun sudah kau pergilah
Jangan kau sesali

Reff:
Karena ku sanggup walau ku tak mau
Berdiri sendiri tanpamu
Ku mau kau tak usah ragu
Tinggalkan aku
Huuu.. kalau memang harus begitu

Tak yakin ku kan mampu
Hapus rasa sakitku
Ku ‘kan selalu perjuangkan cinta kita
Namun apa salahku
Hingga ku tak layak dapatkan kesungguhanmu

Back to Reff:

baby now that you're gone
now leave me alone
broken heart
tear me apart
i don't need your mercy
i ain't your lady
this melody
did you hear it?
let's shout it again
take me back to refrain

Back to Reff :

Tak perlu kau buatku mengerti
Tersenyumlah karena ku sanggup

Notes :
This song totally bring goosebumps to me the moment i heard it. :)
and what makes me even more amazed, this song's created by Agnes herself, and Andi Rianto!! :D
FYI, this song is from a true story by Agnes herself..
It's a story 'bout a girl who would give 100% of her to a man she loves, but unfortunately, the man didn't seem to appreciate that, and therefore, this girl told him that if he wanted to leave her, then leave.. she'll be okay.. :'(
This song is way too cool! Uber love this song,, ;)

Have You Ever

Have You Ever


Sometimes it's wrong to walk away, though you think it's over
Knowing there's so much more to say
Suddenly the moment's gone
And all your dreams are upside down
And you just wanna change the way the world goes round

Tell me, have you ever loved and lost somebody
Wished there was a chance to say I'm sorry
Can't you see, that's the way I feel about you and me, Baby
Have you ever felt your heart was breaking
Lookin down the road you should be taking
I should know, cos I loved and lost the day I let you go

Can't help but think that this is wrong, we should be together
Back in your arms where I belong
Now I've finally realised it was forever that I've found
I'd give it all to change the way the world goes round

I really wanna hear you say that you know just how it feels
To have it all and let it slip away, can't you see
Even though the moment's gone, I'm still holding on somehow
Wishing I could change the way the world goes round



PS: never stop loving this song,, :)

welcome home

holla,,
it's been quite a long time, eh,,,
geez,, as what i've mentioned in my previous entry, time flies so fast,,,
see, it's almost the end July now,,
and in two weeks, i'll have to face what-so-called FINAL EXAM,, *jrengjreng*
that's scary,,
i'm too lazy to memorize!! >.<

well,, so far,, things have been way complicated,,,
but,,, i don't want to think too much, tho,,
it'll just make things more complicated than it already has,, haha,,

ah,,, finally,,
tomorrow's the last day of school,,
but i have to present the program and the documentation which i haven't touched at all,,,
ugh,, hopefully i can finish it on time,, 'cause tomorrow one of my girls will be back here in Medan!!
Welcome home, babe,,,
it's been so long since we've met,,
the last time i saw her was like 3years ago,,,
arghh,,
can't wait to meet her soon,, :D


well,,, i don't know what else should i share you guys now,,
so,, ttyl,, :D

time flies,,

Wow,,
It’s almost June,,,
Time flies so fast, eh,,??
So many hellos,, so many goodbyes,, so many changes,,
All of them happened in a short time,,
Sometimes,,
When I look back,,
I can see lots of memories behind,,
Lots of laughter,,
Lots of tears,,
Lots of fears,,
Lots of disappointments,,
Lots of relieves,,
Those are moments for us to treasure, eh,,??
And to learn as well,,
I’ve been thinking how many things have changed in my life,,
People came,, people left,, some of them stays,,
Well,, as someone has said,, remember the past but don’t live in it,,
I believe it’s true,,
Whatever is left behind,, let it be,,
Let it be a memory for you to treasure,,,:)


I’ve quit my job as a playgroup teacher for quite a while,,
And somehow I miss teaching,, and playing with my kids,,
Miss them so bad,, :'(
I still remember my last day there,,,
It was so sudden,,
Never thought it was my last day there,,
Everything just happened,,,
And I decided to say goodbye,,
Gosh, I miss all of them,, (I mean ALL,, from those 3 places I’ve ever taught before,,)
Miss you all!! *hugs hugs hugs and kisses kisses kisses*


Tryshella




Sabrina








i miss you all,,, :o


Osvaldo (dodo) - Vittoria (vitto) - Kathleen Virgo (vigo) - Cherry


Delvyn - Kathleen Virgo


Livia


Nathaniel


Charel

I miss high school too,,,
I can’t believe how fast time passed,,,
Next year it’s my graduation,,
Can you imagine,,, hais,,
I’m excited and confused at the same time,, haha,,


I miss all my girls,,,
It’s been quite a while since we met each other,,
One of them is busy with her college,,,
Three of them are abroad,,,
And I’m so glad that this 31st May,,
One of my girls is coming back to Medan,,,
I miss her so much,,,
We seldom contact each other,,,
But when we met,,,
We’re still as close as before,,
Now that’s what I called friendship,,,
You don’t have to communicate 24 hours each day..
But you remember each other in your heart, they stay there all the time,,, :)
Can’t wait to see her soon,,, *hugs and kisses*


Wenti - Devina


Stacia - Elen


Ah, one more thing,,,
Have you ever felt something strange,,, like,,, you guys get to meet each other often,,
But somehow you still miss them,,,
It’s like something’s missing, something's strange,, something's different,,,?? But you don’t know exactly what it is,,,,!! *confused*
Hmm,, strange, isn’t it,,?

Well,, I better off to bed soon,,,
I’m blabbering too much tonight,,=.=
I just want to share how much I miss all those moments,,, :o
Bye, guys,,,

-Voila-

what is love?

holla guys,,,
seems like my blog is so dead, eh??
well, let's skip that,,
tonight i'm going to share you guys bout this movie "The Notebook",, :)
someone warned me to prepare lots of tissues before i watch this movie,,
and,,,
wohoo,, this movie surely made me cry like a baby,,,
after i finished watching this movie,,
my eyes were swollen like being punched and tissues are everywhere to be found,, haha,,
i've watched it twice within 3days, by the way,,,
and tell you what,,, this movie is totally great,,,
it taught me lots of lessons,,,
you guys should really watch this movie,,, :D
Here's a tagline from this movie : Behind every great love is a great story,,, :) :)

Love being alone,,

what a tiring day,,
had an assignment discussion with my friends at bucks this afternoon,,
i arrived there earlier,,
i did it on purpose anyways,,hehe,,
i had my fave choco croissant and caramel java chip as usual,,
and i enjoyed that moment very much,,
it's only me,,
sat down,,
and try to relax my mind,,,
surprisingly it was fun,,
planning to do it again next time,, haha,, *winkwink*

well, i have to thank my friend for helping me with my assignment,,,
you're really our savior,,,,!! :D

but it's just the lecturer,,,
he didnt even pay attention when we were presenting our project back then,,
tsktsktsk,,
he is sure annoying,,, =.="

well, we finished our class around 6sth,,
and i headed for dinner with my friends,,, :)

had this stupid headache the whole day,,
and there're spots on my feet, my hands, my neck,, and it itch a lot!
damn this stupid allergic,,,
and this allergic made me hard to breathe,,,
ckckck,,,

Happy,,

24032010,,,
a simple thing and simple sentences that made me happy before i go to sleep,,
and im not telling you,,, *winkwink*
happy happy lol lol,,, :)

Hacker!! >:O

what a bad day,,,
someone hacked my fb account, my email account, and my msn account!
combo attack!
tsktsktsk,,
ruined my mood for the whole day,,
hope it wont be used for sth bad,,, =.="

A simple date,,

last night i had so much fun,,,,,
i went out for dinner with one of my long-lost friend,,,
actually we were really close back then...
shared a lot of stories,,,,
and i dont even remember why we drifted apart,,,err,,,not apart exactly,,,like,,,
further,,,
then,,,
lately i find myslef talking and chat with her again,,,
shared a lot of stories like we used to back then,,,
i realize how much i miss her,,,
and its been so long we havent met each other face to face,,,
even we're in the same college recently,,
hahaha,,,
and last night,,,
i asked her out,,,
hahaha,,,
sounds so lesbian,,,
but we're not!! it'sd just i've been missing her,,,
hahaha,,
then we went for dinner at ubud,,,
talked for i dont know how long,,,,
sat there and shared a lot of stories and that was so much fun!!!!
i love my date with her last night,,hahaha,,,
i hope she had a l0t of fun like i did too,,,
it feels like...
ugh,,,
it's been so longgggg....
and im glad that i can share a lot of stories with her,,,
feel relieved,,,
she's a good listener,,,
i hope i can be one for her too,,, :)
after that dinner,,,
we went home,,,
i saw her onlining and i told her that i had so much fun,,
and she said that she did too!! :D
then i had a chat with other friends,,,
both of em made me laugh out loud!!
one of em even shared me a song,,,
and that song is sooooo,,,,,
nice! i love it,,,
and we even found nicknames,,,
inspired from musical instruments,,,
hahaha,,
for me,,him,, and two of my besties as well,,,
man,,,
i really laughed a lot last night,,,
hopefully i can laugh more and more often in the future,,
and i had a good sleep too last night,,or should i say,,,,this early morning??hahhahaa,,,,

and now here i am,,
sitting down doing my assignment,,,
and updating my blog,,,
holiday's overrr,,,,
aaaa,,,
i need more!! hahaha,,,
will update soon, bloggie,,, :D

Untitled,,

yesterday,,,
there are so many things happened,,,
my new shopkeeper,,,lost nowhere,,,
no news at all,,
and when we checked our stuffs,,
some of em are missing,,,
damn,,,
such a thief,,,huh!!

and i did talked,,,chat,,,with someone new,,,
surprisingly,,
she's a very friendly person,,,
she's so funny as well,,,
it's great to know someone new,,,
to make new friends,,, :)

omg,,,
its so hot right here,,,,
its blackout,,
no air conditioner and no fan at all,,
can u imagine how hot is that,,???urghhh,,,,
and im starving rite now,,!! help!! =.='

Chinese New Year,,

today is the second day of CNY,,,
yesterday was the first day and also Valentine's Day,,,
i was so happy yesterday, i can spend the whole day with my family members and relatives,,,,
even somehow i thought about sth,,,hehehe,,
but im glad that i never regret everything happened in the past,,
there must be sth good from all of those experiences and stories,,,
i tried my best to be a better person,,,err,,,not "tried",,,im trying anyway,,,
try to be a positive-thinking person,,,
it feels good though,,,
hehehe,,,

today, me and my family went to shop some groceries,,,
then we headed to temple,,,
talked and chit chat there,,,
in which,,,reminds me to sth funny that happened there,,,,
wahahaha,,,,*embarrassed!!*

after that we decided to go to my mommy's relative's house,,,
spent some time talking,,,
eating,,,
and collect some red pockets,,,(hihi)
after that we went to Cambridge,,,
to had our dinner,,,
at Jing,,
hehee,,
nice one,,,
we also took picture with the Barongsai,,,,
met some of my friends,,,
that was so much fun!!!
well,that's all for today,,hehehe,,,